Pride Or Plain Honesty?

I did my laundry as soon as I woke up yesterday but I didn't get around to sorting it till it was about 1:00am, after I was done with the internet. The Internet though; a blessing and a curse. Believe me, I could write a thesis on that. Anyway, that's not why we are here today. While I was as sorting out my clothes in the closet, a thought occurred to me. I stared at my walk in closet and my vain self thought "I'm not sure I can live in a house without a walk in closet o" I was barely done thinking that when another thought popped up "ah ah? When did that one start, which manner of shakara is that one?" Ladies and gentlemen, those are some of the mind battles I fight on a daily basis. LOL. Now, a year ago, I did not have a room with a walk in closet and life was fine, perfect. So, why on earth was it seeming like such a big deal now that I had one? I couldn't help but think that by indulging us or by giving us some of the comforts of life, are our parents helping us or not helping us? I have heard of strange cases where a very rich man would deliberately deny his children of some luxuries under the guise of discipline. That is absolutely absurd to me though, I mean why would my father have millions/billions sitting duck in his account, and I would be going about living life like a pauper because of discipline? I think that is weird. However, the fact of life is that some people have been thoroughly indulged, such that they can not handle some of life's petty challenges, much more the complexities. And their being very ignorant of the other side of life would be very genuine, even though people around them may think otherwise. I remember one Sunday in church; I sat by my brother and his friend during the service. While the pastor was preaching, he made a reference to a poor person who could not afford five or ten Naira, I can't remember the exact figure but it was something extremely meager. My brother's friend (who is from a wealthy/quite affluent home) turned to him and said:

"Is that possible? How can someone be that poor? I mean is that laziness or something because I pretty much can't understand why someone wouldn't be able to afford five Naira."

I stared at him in utter disbelief. I was so irritated by his statement that on getting home, it was the first thing I brought up. How could someone who lived his whole life in Nigeria think such? How could he genuinely be so oblivious to the abject poverty in Nigeria? I was furious. Now, imagine me, someone who did not grow up in poverty, being so angry. I mean, I did not grow up in a Dangote household but as much as I may try to empathize, I still don't know or understand what poverty truly is. God forbid that I do. My brother explained to me that his friend was not being proud, naive, yes but not proud. He explained that the young man had lived his whole life within the four walls of his father's 'mansions' and may certainly have had no idea of the real world out there.We tabled that issue and after going back and forth, I finally begun to realize and even more, understand what really happened. It was then and much later, that I started to realize that, it is not always pride or arrogance when people make some statements.

For instance, I once tweeted  the statement below;
"You really don't need to get angry because some of your fantasies are someone else's basic way of life. That is just how life is, sometimes."
Fact of life. If someone said something like, "I can't ever fly Economy, ugh. I just can't stand the discomfort" or something like that. I know myself, my first  thought would be, "What is wrong with this one?" Meanwhile in reality, such a person was being totally genuine (in some cases). It was not pride or arrogance, that was just someone stating their genuine piece of mind and being totally honest. Flying First Class may be a fantasy of mine (not may, It IS) but it is also somebody else's basic way of life. Heck, some people never fly commercial planes. ha-ha. So, you see, to each his own. You just have to cut your coat according to your size or more practically, book your ticket according to your pocket. The solution to seeing someone else live 'THE LIFE' is not to live above your means like everybody seems to be doing these days. Some people are so caught up with the facade on Twitter and the chief culprit, Instagram that they get very frustrated with their own lives. I can be very nonchalant so envy is not my thing at all, I don't look at people and go "ohhhh, look at her loubs" and start thinking, to the point of frustration, about how to get my own pair of red soles. I honestly do not have that type of time. It should motivate you to work harder or as people say these days 'hustle more' but it certainly should not make you unsatisfied with your own awesome albeit lack of Louboutins life. I believe that while such things should motivate you, you should never use them as yardsticks to measure your own life. I like the Yoruba proverb; "Eni ti o ba mo ibi ti egbe e ti la, o ma sa ku ni." (Whoever does not know the source of their peers' wealth, will 'run' till they die) That's translating it literally but I prefer to put it as ' mad' because that is really what happens. I know blogger and vlogger, Sisi Yemmie posted a youtube video recently about comparing yourself with others and it was very apt. Run your own race, be in a competition with yourself. Most importantly, be focused on God's plan for your own life and your own journey. Do not get me wrong, healthy competition is fine, it's great. But there is a limit and frankly, except you know and understand this limit, you will most likely be miserable for the greater part of your life.

P.S: I want to start posting fiction here and I will (nobody can stop me anyway) lol. Anyway, if I start and it doesn't sound/look good, I will respect myself and stop. Lol


  1. Wow! My beautiful daughter, you are really going "nuclear" with your blog. As for posting fiction or (fac)tion henceforth, even the sky should not be allowed to limit someone like you who started writing short stories (fiction) from the age of six...I still have them in my folder. So, all you need do is keep it up!

  2. LOL @ Nuclear, I dey try jare. lol. Yes oh, I will try to keep it up too. :D

  3. I look forward to reading your fiction. Please tag me when you post them. Thanks