March 30--Nigeria Has Decided.

Monday!! Before I get into today's gist, let me digress. Today's weather was really good. It was the perfect spring weather. I even took some awe of awe of God's admiration of God's creativity.
Sunshine :-D
Election weekend in Nigeria!!! Where do I begin to describe this past weekend? For one, Nigerians are now more aware of things. Gone are the days when we would be very indifferent and nonchalant. There was a time Nigerians would not even step out of their houses to vote. Last weekend though, Nigerians proved they had had enough. There comes a time in the history of a nation, when the people come together in unity for change. I heard it was a rainy day in Lagos, yet majority went out to vote, to prove that power belongs to them. I even saw pictures of very old men and women, step out (mostly aided by walking sticks or younger people) to vote. They are also concerned about the Nigeria they would be leaving behind.

At this stage, like I have been saying on all my social media, I am just glad that now those political leaders looting the nation will finally realize that the power belongs to we Nigerians.  The real victory belonged to Nigeria and Nigerians. Our voices have been heard. If any politician messes up, we will VOTE them out. 

The final results aren't even out, but I have to trust in and believe in the system. I have to trust that this system has not betrayed me or the other 169 million Nigerians. It is my hope that fellow Nigerians accept this too. I pray for a peaceful Nigeria. I am one of the many who was hoping the incumbent gets (got?) voted out. That also means I am one of the many people who received unnecessary insults, both directly and indirectly. I have tried throughout the entire process anyway, to remain as objective as possible. This was even more possible because I am not partisan, and I usually try to not be, instead I stick with a candidate I believe stands out based on his/her principles, commitment, values etc. Although, I don't have the slightest idea why anyone would want to support GEJ (except you have vested interests), I have tried nonetheless to respect everyone's individual opinions. That being said, the priority is Nigeria. I want Nigeria to win.

The announcement of the winner was scheduled for today. The process which would turn out to be very long, tedious and almost boring (thank God for Twitter) made many nervous. Even I did not think I would be as tensed, as I had been calm all weekend. Although the process will be continued tomorrow, today will go down history books in Nigeria as that day when all Nigerians stayed glued to watch history unfold. The truth is no matter who wins the election, the next four years...let me just say I leave those years in God's hands. Imagine my surprise when I figured some people were wishing the opposition failure (should he win) just to be vindicated. As someone on Twitter said, that is like cutting off your nose to spite your own face; you are only hurting yourself.

Again, I am glad this weekend happened. It was memorable. It was history. It was good. 

Here's to change!



When my father was my age, he was not just fully responsible for himself; but he was comfortable enough to take care of his own father, get a sophisticated apartment, and live life as comfortably as a young person in their twenties so desired. On the other hand, there’s me and millions of others currently in their twenties – many of whom can barely take care of themselves, how much more take responsibility for someone else. The economy of Nigeria must have been more favorable to my father’s generation. Or are we just unlucky? Aren’t things supposed to be getting better?
We should remember this salient fact when we walk into those polling booths on Saturday. We are no longer so little as to be indifferent about the elections, or turn a blind eye, or worse, ‘run off’ during elections. Young people need to claim what we want — a better Nigeria. We can’t do that by paying no mind to politics.
Politics is intense. It is sometimes exhausting, but it is definitely necessary. March 28, 2015 is fast approaching. It is the day Nigeria decides her fate for the next four years. In the past few months, we have seen candidates campaign—or smear each other’s campaigns. I thought about writing this piece in an effort to sway you towards a particular direction. However, it might be better to be as objective as possible. Personally, I don’t care much for political partisanship. Rather, I believe in personal principles, values, commitment, and ideology. I have tried to weigh the major candidates on these bases. I suggest you do the same, realistically.
Remember though that we need the experience and tactic of older people to run the country, we also need the originality, enthusiasm, and energy of the young people. Ultimately, the choice of who to vote for belongs to you and you, alone.
However, as with everything in life, weigh your options, and pick the better/best of those options. If you owned a trillion Naira company, or perhaps you invested trillions of Naira in an establishment, would you select a manager because both of you sit in the same pew in church on Sundays? Would you select a manger because you both bowed in the same direction in obeisance to Allah? It would definitely be less-than-smart to pick such a manager on the basis of trivial sentiments like your tribe. I urge you to appeal to your inner conscience; in the name of whomever you serve, to make the choice you believe is the absolute best for our nation. Look at past experiences, goals, plans…look at the people around each candidate because, eventually no one man can run the nation alone.
I am not ignorant enough to forget that there are some groups of people with vested interests, who would prefer for Nigeria to rot in misery. I am positive, however, that the majority would rather see Nigeria thrive. We can pray all we want, but God has given us the gift of freewill and choice. Ultimately, the power belongs to we the people.
And this goes for every level of the election—legislative representatives, state governors, and local government chairpersons—which is just as important as the presidential election itself. While we vote for our leaders on March 28, it is imperative that we also decide to be better followers—better Nigerians.
May the best person(s) win.

This article was first posted on Bellanaija.

Loveoasis Magazine

I have written about Loveoasis magazine time and time again. And I really hope you always check it out. There’s a new edition and let me just tell you, it’s really good. This time around, we have put it a digital magazine newsstand for your viewing pleasure. Now I understand you might want to take my review with a pinch of salt considering duh, I am the Editor, what else will I say, but good things? I promise you though; I am being as honest and unbiased as possible. The magazine is really good, but there’s only one way to find out—check it out yourself at It took a lot of work to publish. I can tell you that first hand. However, after reading it with fresh eyes when it was out, I was truly impressed.
Apart from just being a beauty to behold, the cover personality and the couples are really interesting people. You’ll love reading about them. The columns too are quite enlightening and entertaining. It was done for your viewing pleasure. Ha-ha. I better stop here and let you go enjoy it yourself. The only thing better than enjoying it yourself, is that you can read it on the go on all your devices. Yes, ALL—tablets, laptops, desktops, phones…anyone is good. The only other thing better than that is that you can also share the goodness with your loved ones. When you do check it out, if you like it, let me know please.

I am so proud of all the work that went into it. Working on it was sometimes painful, but seeing some of it come together makes it all very worth it. I think we did a pretty good job (if I say so myself) so I hope you all check it out.  Thank you all.


People Watching: Pink Blondie

I was walking down a pathway last week—one of those days with the perfect spring weather—when I noticed this family of three in front of me. I quickly came back to reality from my deep thoughts, as I was sure there was going to be something rather interesting about them. A father, with two young children I presumed were his; the girl about six or seven, sashaying in her all-pink outfits. It’s almost an annoying loud shade of pink, but I would call it ‘cute’, because you have to be nice to children. She seemed like a connoisseur of fashion and style. Her brother, although just about ten or eleven was much better in appearance, and seemed like a nicer version, or at least sounded like one.

Friday Reflections

1.) Monica Lewinsky; she confuses me a lot. What exactly does she want? Pity?

 2.) I don't support internet bullying, and I believe it's high time Monica's forgiven. Like, everyone should just leave her or better still, she should shut her mouth.

3.) Empire's season finale was much more drama than I could handle.

4.) I think I have a mild case of PTSD after seeing a finger nail in my sandwich.

5.) When will people realize that being reserved and seemingly 'quiet' does not necessarily mean such person typically has zero opinions on everything?

6.) Two of the topics of discussion on Twitter this past week were long term relationships and proposal stories.

7.) It's not that I'm a fan of long term relationships, (I don't like them at all) but if you think eleven years is too much to be with a person, how do you expect to be with them for the rest of your life?

8.) To each his own.

9.) I don't have an ideal proposal story (there are far better things I do with my time.) However, I would love for my future husband to talk to my parents (and siblings) first before proposing to me. It's only proper. And yeah, I am conservative like that.

10.) It is with a heavy heart that I announce that I do not think wigs are for me anymore. They give me headaches and itch like crazy, literally.

11.) I am now completely confused on what next to do with my hair. Therefore, I will be making some drastic changes soon, stay tuned.

Tiny Genuises

Thanks to my sister, I discovered Nola Gould of Modern Family was listed as one of the fifty smartest teenagers. I found it really ironic since he plays the role of a very dumb, albeit troublesome young lad on Modern Family. To cut a long story short, I went on Google to research these teenagers. Lo and behold, I became depressed. You can't read that list and not think about your life. I mean, what are you doing with your life when children--yes, children--are finding cures to cancer, building cars, graduating from MIT at freaking 16! UGHH

I know, I know, everybody can't have an IQ equal to Einstein's or be so PERFECT at such a young age. It still brings the question of what exactly you're doing with your life though. I remember tweeting once: "Some people know exactly what they want out of this life. I envy such people." I am reiterating that again. I did notice something though, most of these geniuses tend to be in the STEM fields. I feel slighted because I believe it should be spread out across all fields. Some people just do ot have as much interest in the STEM fields as in other fields like social science and humanities. Like one of the geniuses said, it is hard to measure creativity and imagination. Anyway, I'm off to work hard at what I know how to do. Peace and love. And oh, if you're interested in wallowing in some self-pity, and you maybe want to see twelve year olds with Doctoral degrees, feel free to check it out on this link

Love, and some excellence,

Friday Reflections

1.) I decided to set a schedule with blogging; three days every week.

2.) Two minutes after making that decision, I almost forgot. It's hard.

3.) There was an interview granted by Chimamanda Adichie earlier this week; very interesting, just to say the least.

4.) Forgiveness is quite difficult.

5.) You sometimes convince yourself that you've forgiven someone, and try to carry on with business as usual. You know deep down though that you are still angry (or just irritated) with that person.

6.) There's this thing in everyone that just yearns for more, no matter how much you already have.

7.) Spring break is kinda over.

8.) I find people who try so hard to give off a 'perfection' vibe extremely pretentious. I find many people extremely pretentious; one trait that disgusts me.

9.) Reading Adichie's interview reminded me how to be a better writer.

10.) You know how you really love a blogger for their originality, and then all of a sudden there's this sudden knack for rebranding and all the shenanigans? Yeah, I don't visit many blogs anymore. Read number 8.

11.) That said, it is definitely fine to want to make the dough or to in fact, rebrand. One of my favorite blogs La Bella Imperfezione rebranded her blog, and the new website is oh so refreshing. I sometimes open the website just to bask in the simplicity and creativity.

12.) I have a bad habit I need to stop really fast: when I read about a great person, and discover they didn't have any children (biological or not), I feel like it was a wasted life.

13.) I know number 12 is probably the most stupid thing you ever read. It's just I believe that one of the best ways to leave a legacy is to pass it on to your children. Or at least find a prodigy.

14.) I understand that we should strive to be irreplaceable, but look at Joan Rivers and how it is next to impossible to find someone to replace her on Fashion Police.

12.) That's all for now folks.

Enjoy your weekend.



International Women's Day.

We are well past the time when Abigail Adams had to write her husband—then president of the United States—reminding him to “remember the ladies and be more generous and favorable to them than your ancestors. Do not put much unlimited power into the hands of the husbands. Remember all men would be tyrants if they could…”

Things have remarkably improved since then, and more women have paved the way for the rest of us coming along. In the United States for instance, there have been several amendments to the constitution in favor of women. There has been the Title IX Amendment, a portion of the United States Education Amendment, which protects people from discrimination based on sex in education programs and activities that receive federal financial assistance equal education for women. There has also been Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, which protects individuals against employment discrimination on the basis of five categories, one of which is sex.

However, we are still very far away from the destination. Women are definitely still discriminated against, sometimes ostracized, and a lot of times seen as the less of both sexes. Unfortunately, in many countries, women are practically enslaved. In some developed countries, equality has been reduced—yes, reduced—to putting a few women in important positions, and leaving it at just that. We now have a female Attorney General, they say. Or we now have a female Minister of Petroleum. While that is a welcome development, it does not reduce the impact of denying a woman a job because of fear that she might someday decide to have children. It does not reduce the havoc that is wrecked when woman is objectified and made to believe that besides the extra tissues on her chest—breasts—and her backside, she really is nothing.

Now, we can debate about the women issues from here till eternity, but if we do nothing about it, it makes no sense. The most important fight in this battle is equality; that men and women are equal members of the society. Period.

On whether or not to be a feminist, here’s my answer: In the words of the legendary Maya Angelou, “I am a feminist. I have been a female for a long time now. I’d be stupid not to be on my own side.” I always used to wonder whether or not I was a feminist because I had seen that concept abused time and time again. But I have since realized that to say you aren’t a feminist would be to insult great women like Betty Friedan who fought endlessly for women. It would be to insult great women like Myra Bradwell, who when she denied admission to the Illinois state bar because she was a woman—even after passing the bar exams in flying colors—fought HARD that women be allowed to become whatever they so desired. I imagine that without Bradwell, many female attorneys today would have been, well you can guess. It would be insulting more legendary women like Funmilayo Ransome Kuti, whose courage I personally admire and marvel at. It would be to undermine our powerful mothers—some of whom had to raise their children alone, without the support of any man. So, in the words of another feminist I admire, Chimamanda Adichie, “We should all be feminists.”

Feminism is advocating the rights of women and/or supporting equality of women. Feminism is NOT hatred of men. Feminism does not in anyway disprove your desire for a husband or boyfriend. As far as I am concerned, feminism is the freedom to choose. It is when women are allowed to be whatever they want to be. It is freewill. Feminism is respecting the woman whose ultimate choice is to be a homemaker. Feminism is also respecting the other woman whose goal is to be the next Sheryl Sandberg, or the next Marissa Mayer, or the next Ngozi Okonji-Iweala. None of those choices trumps the other. As far as it is the woman’s choice, it is valid.

Therefore, let us accept the brightly burning torches that these great women have passed onto us and keep passing it on. Let us teach our daughters that playing victim is for the loser. Deciding to choose victory irrespective of what the society says of you is indeed the real victory. Let us teach those coming behind us that they are more than what the see in the mirror. What they see in the mirror is fabulous; it’s just that what they have inside—that beautiful mind—is even more amazing.

Here’s to great women; may we know them, may we be them, may we raise them.

Happy International Women’s day to all the wonderful women you and I have ever known, and most especially to my wonderful mother. I am, because you first were.


P.S: This post (or a variant of it) was first published on Bellanaija.

The Other Wes Moore.

"The chilling truth is that is story could have been mine.
  The tragedy is that my story could have been his."

Two kids named Wes Moore were born blocks apart within a year of each other. Both grew up fatherless in similar Baltimore neighborhoods and had difficult childhoods; both hung out on street corners  with their crews; both ran into trouble with the police. How, then, did one grow up to be a Rhodes Scholar, decorated veteran, White House Fellow, and business leader, while the other ended up a convicted murderer serving a life sentence? Wes Moore, the author of this fascinating book, sets out to answer this profound question. In alternating narratives that take readers from heart-wrenching losses to moments of surprising redemption, The Other Wes Moore tells the story of a generation of boys trying to find their way in a hostile world.

This is probably one of the most phenomenal books I have ever read. It wasn't just the story, but the style of writing. Wes had the attention of the reader from beginning to the end. I picked it up a Saturday morning, and did not drop it till I was done the following morning. I had never heard of any of the Wes Moores. The book was one of others we had to read in a book club I joined. What are the odds? That the same day the Baltimore Sun published an article about the author, Wes Moore, with the headline "Local Graduate Named Rhodes Scholar.", there was another story about another Wes Moore who had been convicted in the robbery in which a police officer was killed. The story of the other Wes would have more impact on the author than his own story. The author had received one of the most prestigious awards for students in the world!

The story of the two men is one that leaves you in deep thoughts, it leaves you pondering about your own background. It also leaves the question of whether all of life is just by grace and perhaps we have no influence whatever on how things turn out, or whether in addition to grace, we have to do our own bit. What role does destiny play? How did the convicted Wes Moore choose to born into a dysfunctional home, and then I or perhaps you choose to be born into the home you are.

I have always had an understanding of the power of family. No man is an island. But even more, is the contribution of those you’re surrounded by in your life. The convicted Wes, hard as his mother tried was bound to end up how he did. His older brother was deeply involved with drug dealers, and was himself a drug dealer. Although, this brother always warned Wes about the dire implications of his juvenile delinquencies, he himself never stopped dealing. You see, it’s one thing to destroy your own life, but to be the tragic influence that destroys the lives of those coming behind? Calamitous. For me, at least.  You have to always remember that there are people who look up to you. Remember the influence your actions may have on such people.

The author Wes also grew up making some wrong choices, but his mother went to extrreme lengths to rescue her son from the streets. She even risked her son hating her at that moment,  but that was a risk she was willing to take.

Throughout the book, Wes kept reiterating that he was no better that the other Wes. I believe he was trying to be modest and didn’t want to come off as a self-righteous person who glorified himself or told his story such that we perceived he deserved everything he achieved. Therefore, he avoided the question I assume was on every reader’s mind: how did he turn out differently, despite having very similar circumstances?

I don’t know more about either of them that I read in the book and I know I have no right to say any crap  about circumstances I have never been in.  I didn’t grow up in a dangerous inner city or a dysfunctional family.  I don’t have any authority on what I am about to say. But yes, you guessed right; I will say them anyway.

If I were to name the two factors that ultimately set the two men apart, judging from reading the book, they would be family and choices. The book would have otherwise been a great source of inspiration and joy to me, but for a sudden realization; the theme of the vicious cycle of repetitive history. By the time the other Wes was about 33 or 35 years old, he too already had a grandchild. While he was in jail, his fifteen year old was already reproducing. There needs to be a renewal of the mind for many young people, especially young black men. What business does an eleven year old have being arrested for attempted murder?

Yes, successful Wes was also almost arrested at a very young age, but for the officer who took pity on him and released him. Wes had tendencies to be a truant and already started showing signs, but again, his mother wouldn’t let him. However, his mother could only do so much; in fact she was able to do as much because his grandparents were available to take care of him and his siblings while she worked. When she had to send him to military school, it was with the help of his grandparents and other family members that she was able to successfully do it. They rallied around to help. What I found really interesting was that Wes wasn’t the only successful one in his family; even his siblings turned put just as successful. On the other hand, the other Wes was arrested with his brother—the same one who dealt drugs. The brother would later die of kidney failure in jail.

Beyond all these, it all boils down to one thing—choice. In the end, we are responsible  for our choices. No matter how hard Wes’ mother could have been on him, if Wes had not decided on his own to make something out of his life, he would have remained in the rot, or be dead. Wes proves that although our backgrounds have a lot of effect on who we turn out to be, ultimately we are the sum total of all our choices. In the same vein, although his father was an irresponsible person who could not recognize his own child, the other Wes could have chosen NOT to be a member of a gang or deal drugs. I am not saying his not doing any of those things would have automatically translated to a better life. I am saying he would never have gone to prison, or be sentenced to life in prison without parole. He had a chance at redemption after he went to a vocational school and got back. It was his opportunity to leave that lifestyle. Eventually, he chose to go back to the former life. He was arrested for a robbery that led to the murder of an officer and convicted.

I just wish that more often than not we would be more careful with our choices. I hope we would always remember that when the consequences of our actions begin to play out, each person would bear those consequences all by themselves. It was a really emotional book, but it also was very eye opening.

03/07: Plus One

Fun fact: I was actually born on Saturday. It's a Saturday today too haha. It is my birthday today. I remember when I thought of early twenties as something so far off. Now, I am almost done with this early twenties business. But I am not one to whine about getting older. It's fun! Many people around me think I am still a small girl though, because they are all older than me.

Anyway, I had a pretty good day; sleeping, relaxing, Skyping/Face-timing loved ones, and just in deep reflection. Some might consider it a bit of a boring day, and I did at first too, but then preferred it just that way. Sometimes, solitude is bliss. Towards the end of the day, I got cakes and chocolates, my joy became complete. LOL. Sugar can do that to anyone.

The best comparison would be to remember this exact day/period last year (Thank you E for reminding me). E also suggested I start Vlogs haha. She really made me laugh today with all her brands of prayers. Anyway, I am in a much better place than I was last year. I am far better than I was, and God has been oh so faithful. I sat for a second today, and thought I really am happy. That's a blessing. I know it can only get better.

Therefore, I am thankful to the almighty God.  I am thankful to my family for showing me time and time again what it means to be so deeply loved. I am thankful to everyone that remembered my birthday, and took it upon themselves to message or call me. Some others went further and said words of prayers. You all are far too kind. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.



P.S: After typing this post, it occurred to me I actually know about four people whose names start from E. This E knows herself <3

P.P.S: Miss M, like I said, I am finding a place in my large heart to forgive you for not letting us be on the beach, in the sun this weekend as we planned. You will make this up to me in many ways you can't imagine haha.

On Setting High Standards...

If you ask me, na who I go ask? I was on my own, minding my business like I promised to. Ok then, I thought to do my Instagram gbeborun* for the day: scroll through my timeline, check out notifications to see who is liking whose picture, who is getting engaged, and who is updating their profiles with ‘booking info’—more on booking info gist later. Anyway, I opened my Instagram, and what did I see? Somebody had spewed something preposterous as a caption to a picture she uploaded. Now before I go on, I promise you this is not an attack on the person, but on the idea. I am not blaming the messenger here, but the message itself. The messenger is actually my friend, so if you are reading this, trust me, we are cool. No hard feelings.

Sidebar: I once read an interview of Chimamada Adichie, where she said in order to be a good writer, you have to just write and forget that your family and friends will  read it. If you keep writing with the thought of your family and friends’ impressions on what you write, you will never write anything. I definitely know what she means. I can’t be doing this all the time; apologizing in advance. So family and friends, if you see something on this blog or elsewhere written by me, love it or hate it, it probably is what I am actually thinking anyway. No attack against your person. Okay? Okay. Let’s move on.