On Denying God and Our Identities

I can't believe I am actually writing another post before the end of the year, but here we are. Haha. I think I will be staying away from end of the year reviews. I'm finding them increasingly narcissistic LOL, not to mention the year was just steady and normal; I'm incredibly thankful for that. The thing with those reviews is they make normal and the mundane seem depressing. My year was anything but depressing: very challenging, yet normal, predictable. The world, more generally was a different beast but yeah, my greatest achievement this year was surviving it. And that's all I will say about it. I might change my mind on this later, (and that will be okay too) but for now nope.

A picture of sunset because...why not? Plus the sun is definitely setting on the year (ha!)
Anyhoo, in the spirit of thinking about the year that ends tomorrow (yikes!) and the one that begins on Monday (yikes, again), I remembered the story of Peter denying Jesus. I remembered because I recently read it again. You know, Jesus predicting beforehand that Peter would deny him, and Peter being all sanctimonious, responded no dawg, we are ride or die. Except, that was not true. Peter denied Jesus three separate times. It made me ask how we often deny Jesus in our lives. How often do we hide that part or maybe some other parts of our lives, just to fit in or so people don't think of us as weird.

When it comes to identity, as I have often said on this blog, my most important one comes from my faith in God, and my privilege as a child of God. I don't even blast these enough. And several identities exist nowadays; and you and I know some people wear their identities like a badge, telling everyone who cares to listen that they are this or that or that or this; whether you care to listen or not. And they are unapologetic about it too. Frankly, denying God doesn't always look like what Peter did; it's usually not as blatant. Most times, it looks like submerging the part of your life that is Christian or whatever part of you that you seem to hide.

Since everything this week has been geared towards or framed as a New Year's thingy, I suggest that in the coming year we all find ways to be true to ourselves, whatever that means. A lot of times it means not caring too much about what others think or say about you. That thing can be very paralyzing: worrying too much about what others feel about you. Sometimes you have worn so many shells that the true you has become buried deep and can't be found. So in the new year, endeavor to not always be so desperate to fit in/for people to like you that you cower, or deem your light, or act differently. If this is unnecessarily abstract, allow me to give an example. Sometimes, I'm a little bit reluctant about wearing certain kinds of weaves/wigs. For one, I hate stuff that brings unnecessary attention to me since I genuinely hate being the center of attention. Not to mention, I was thinking twice about doing my loud and big, but fine braids. It's not that I was ashamed, I just was not in the mood to explain my hair to every curious tom, dick, and harry. When [non-black] people ask questions about how my hair changes so often or questions about specific style (forgetting that us black women are expressive with our hair); having to field all those questions (especially to several people) sometimes makes me uncomfortable. Instead of doing what I wanted anyway, I was ready to not do something I genuinely felt like doing because of some other people. Nah, we are leaving all that BS in 2017. Be yourself as much as you can without being obnoxious or ridiculous. There are many facets to us human beings; share your individuality; add color to the world; SHINE.

Love, and some glitz (for the new year),


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