International Women's Day 2019

Instead of Friday Reflections, today will be a full blown post. I was going to do the regular Friday Reflections but I realized I have done an International Women's Day post for the past four years and I am not about to break my streak. Nope. Plus I will always have something to say on a day for phenomenal people. Okay? Okay. First, see the International Women's Day posts for 2015, 2016, 2017, and 2018. A lot of things I said in those posts and will say in today's posts, I have said variants of elsewhere on this blog and frankly in real life too.  The point being, don't just talk, DO!

Google Doodle, March 8, 2019


As my old posts will show, I always celebrate International Women's Day. But I now worry a lot about romanticizing what it means to be a woman in this world. I will do you one better, we now romanticize what it means to be a woman of color in this world. Even for a relatively privileged woman like me, being a [black] woman is not the easiest thing in the world. You have to worry about what to say, when to say, your hair, your skin, YOU. Am I too much? Am I making them uncomfortable? Have I said too much? Is my hair too big? Is she being racist or am I just making a big deal of it? And these are first world problems. When you go down several notches to the feminization of poverty, to rape, to sexual harassment, to domestic violence, to servitude (because some of you aren't wives, you're servants. Yeah, I said it), you realize the current state is not very bright.

So if you are not actively supporting and empowering the women in your life (romantic partners, friends, sisters, subordinates, coworkers etc.) but you are on social media posting shit. Screw you. And erm, do better.

Happy International Women's Day to all the phenomenal and hardworking women in my life. I love you ladies! The best part is, you know this. Or at least, I hope you do.

In some interesting coincidence, IWD is a day after my birthday. This year's birthday was awesome. It was truly, truly great. Apart from spending time with my amazing family, I also realized I have outgrown several pettiness. Before, I would be angry at the friends who didn't call me or didn't at least try to get me gifts or whatever. This year, I didn't care about all that trash Lol. What I remember is my friend E waking me up with a video call, and since she is very hilarious, I can honestly say I woke up with the kind of bellyaching laughter I love. What I remember is laughing and celebrating with my family all day. I remember the hour long phone call with my S. I remember the lovely note my friend, R wrote in the card she gave me a whole week before my birthday. I remember messages from my other friends. And I remember missed calls from other friends and family. Nothing else matters. And this kind of growth really, truly surprises me because before now no one was as petty as me. I guess that's growth? Or not? Who cares? Right now, I'm worried I won't remember which initial belongs to whom when I read this post in ten years. Oops. But I also don't want to write their names. Poor things. They didn't ask for a big-mouthed, blogger friend and that's all they got. So no full names here.


More seriously, this new chapter, I am hoping for daring faith and a shift in perspective. When Moses sent those twelve spies to the promised land. Ten of them came back with daunting reports filled with fear. "There is no way we can conquer those folks. They are bloody giants." Of the remaining two, Caleb said, "erm nope. We should go now to take that land, for we can certainly do it." I want to be Caleb. This is not some faux optimism. This is believing in the capabilities of God. This is understanding the inherent nature and core character of God. This is faith

So to daring faith, love, and bellyaching laughter.

Love,

I

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