Ayesha Curry Vs. Stephen Smith: A Case Of Male Privilege

I wanted to be very Zen with  my post today and talk about gratitude. But you see, when I see male privilege, I love to check it there and then.

Now excuse me if my details are spotty, I don't do sports. Pun not intended. But come with me; let me show you male privilege. Steph Curry is a famous NBA player and a two-time consecutive MVP. A quick Google search will tell you all you need to know about him. You'll see his life is what you would call #GOALS. Also, the guy has the most adorable family, built on what looks like a firm foundation in Christ.  At his games and at award ceremonies honoring him, it is not unusual to see his family cheering for him. He was raised a Christian, and is famous for his Philippians 4:13 mantra. To him, it is more than just being a superstar; it’s about using your platform to tell people about God. He’s peaceful, good-looking, hardworking, and talented. On top of all this, he has an equally (perhaps, slightly more) beautiful wife. The wife, Ayesha Curry.

You see how I went on and on about Steph being what dreams are made of for us girls. Well, let’s just say Ayesha is the equivalent to guys. She birthed his two ADORABLE daughters; At a point, she stayed home to look after their daughters; She gave up her acting career to support the husband full-time by caring for the home, while he travelled around the country playing Basketball; She COOKS; She is a Christian who is not afraid of embracing chastity; She is #GOALS. And that’s not a problem, not for me. I actually really love her, as I have often said. She however, became a poster child for the type of woman guys wanted. Her name became synonymous with great, so much that guys  wouldn’t say, “I want a great woman.” No, they would say, “I want an Ayesha Curry." “Why can’t you be an Ayesha Curry?” “Does Ayesha Curry have two heads?” Etc.

It made me and I suspect, even Ayesha Curry herself uncomfortable, just a little bit. Because I KNEW that these people were only blabbing because Ayesha looked subservient; she wouldn’t say much at the time. Even when she did, it was to remind we women to cover up our bodies. So I knew a time would come when they would renege on the encomiums. Although I knew it was imminent, I did not know things would happen so fast.

Ayesha is a good cook. She first started with a food blog, then she moved to a YouTube channel, where she would sometimes feature her husband. Like any good entrepreneur, she capitalized on her husband’s fame and it started to bring back good proceeds. She now has a book, a cooking show, a restaurant, and lines of products. With all these came more social media following and just more awareness of her presence. Somehow, she became more vocal. Somehow, Ayesha Curry became more opinionated. I liked her before, but I started to love her. Bring in the male privilege.

Sometime last week, her husband’s team played against another team. I am sorry I am not interested in even finding out the names of the teams. Honestly, I couldn’t care less about all that. During the game, Steph Curry went out of character, got very angry when he was called for his sixth foul, and he threw his mouth guard at a fan. He was just reacting to what he thought was unfair; he didn’t mean to hurt the fan. I don’t ever watch his games but I follow him on social media, so even I was shocked when I heard how he reacted. In his defense though, he apologized. Along the same lines, his wife tweeted that the game had been rigged and her husband and by effect, his team were being cheated.
Curled from http://madamenoire.com/

Well well well…that was how she incurred the wrath of the same people that put her on a pedestal. In came the fury. Let me take you back a little: Steph Curry THREW a mouth guard on someone. Steph Curry cussed at the referee. Ayesha Curry merely tweeted. Well, guess who took more heat? All of a sudden, she had become too opinionated. Cue in the disapproval. Never mind that at the same time her father was being racially profiled, so she must have been in a foul mood. Never mind that she took down the tweet (which I don’t like). Never mind that she apologized (which I also do not like). Men, privileged men like ESPN commentator, Stephen  A. Smith who still think we are in the
50s—an era where women were not allowed to have an opinion—felt it right to check Ayesha by telling her to be more like Savannah James [Lebron James’s wife]. He said:

“…As beautiful as everybody wants to say Ayesha Curry is and she is, Savannah is something special…She’s wonderful inside and out. She sits there, she doesn’t bring any attention to herself. She never tweets and goes out there and calls out the league and stuff like that…if this were Savannah acting like this, do you know how much heat LeBron James may have taken? I just want people to think about that.”

And this Stephen Smith person is notorious for his misogyny and chauvinism. Look at this:

Curled from madamnoire.com

Let's get back to Ayesha. You see, Ayesha was the perfect woman as long as she was quiet, as long as she did what THEY wanted. As long as she seemed subservient and wouldn’t dare question their authority. As long as she did not have a voice. Whether consciously or subconsciously, many men still think this way. They think the woman should only be seen and not heard. They can’t understand why a woman should dare have an opinion. They think the men should do the talking while the woman should stay back home where they are needed; they want us to stay in our place, the kitchen.

It’s why some people can’t understand women who CHOOSE to have a career rather than marry. They think women who don’t want kids are insane.  Male chauvinists did not just exist in the twentieth and nineteenth centuries. NO. Heck no. They are everywhere: they are the blabbing morons on Twitter who have absolutely nothing to offer but are seeking women who want to offer it ALL; they are the chauvinist boss who thinks female periods signals weakness and inferiority; they are overbearing husbands who reduce you and ALL your worth to only cooking food. They are everywhere. They think men can do what they want, when they want, and how they want. But how dare we women? Male Privilege 101.

Again, you can be what you want to be. That is the point. You can want to offer it ALL. You can want to sacrifice it ALL. But you can also want to sacrifice nothing. You can want a career and not a family. You can want a family and not a career. But you can also want both. You can want to be quiet, reserved. But you can also want to be opinionated. You can stay with a cheater. But you can also leave the cheater.  You can want a loser for a husband (please don’t). You can also want a powerful, educated, excellent man who is also good looking. YOU can. The point is that you should be able to be what YOU want. The choice should ultimately belong to you, not what some idiots want you to be. Not the idea of whom they think you should be. You can be whoever you want to be. And you should.



  1. Very informative piece. Keep up the brilliant work. The fourth line to the end got me tho "@ some idiots" lol.