Friday Reflections

1.) Money CAN in fact buy happiness.

2.) I have never actually thought I could physically harm someone until I saw this.

3.) How to stop caring about what other people think

4.) The power of vulnerability

5.) We all need to do better,

6.)  How's summer going?

7.) Okay fine, I just gotta mention it: what the hell is going on in Nigeria, and quite frankly in America too?

8.) There is a recent disregard for human lives all around and I can't wrap my head around it.

On Baseball and Our Differences

I went to a baseball game weeks ago. And it was literally the most boring event I have ever gone to [in my entire life]. I can't even begin to describe how uninterested I was. But I went, and I even took pictures. So here are pictures for your entertainment. I can't believe anyone enjoys baseball. What?! Yet, people were cheering and clapping and making noise. At some point, I looked at the players and thought, how can this be your life? Like, you get to do something so boring for a living; day in day out. And immediately, I realized they could say the exact same thing about me and what I do. I mean, what I do is NOT boring [to me]: on the contrary, it's challenging, invigorating, and usually very interesting. But to others with absolutely no interest or understanding of my work, it would probably be the most boring thing in the world. And that's just life and human beings: so different, yet so alike in many ways.

Okay picture time.



Friday Reflections

1.) How God messed up this atheist's happy life.

2.) April Kepner's formidable strength is admirable. Honestly, Sarah Drew has been FIRE this season; it is incredibly sad to see her go.

3.) What I love about Kepner is how unlike TV's "baddest" women she is: not assertive or aggressive, but still filled with immense strength. That's something we can all relate to.

4.) I feel like often times tv shows and movies portray strong women and feminists as this formidable, assertive women who go for what they want, when they want it...whereas in real life many of us display our strength piece by piece and quietly (but not always successfully) fight for what we believe. Many of us actually doubt ourselves a lot, yet we are still quietly resilient.

5.) This profile on Chimamanda Adichie will make you love her even more.

6.) Read this to get a better understanding of the opioid and other drug addiction in Nigeria. Also big ups to BuzzFeed and that reporter for that stellar reporting; fantastic job!

7.) More women are speaking at Graduation ceremonies than ever before.

An Update and Some Life Lessons

I found this very old post I wrote on my phone while visiting Chicago in April(!) for a conference. And I thought to finally share it. I also put some notes in parentheses to reflect my comments from reading about my state of mind just merely two months ago. Enjoy!

I visited Chicago for the first time!! But I weirdly didn't take pictures which makes no real sense lol. That place is cold and I understand winter has refused to leave everywhere, but the cold was especially troubling or shall I say the wind? I was also just recovering from being ill so it just was not the best trip. (Note: I was so sick in April; everyday I can eat and walk now is a testimony for me)

But I enjoyed it nonetheless! I went to present my work and that was mega successful and quite encouraging too.

Found this random and only picture I took with my friend, Barbara

P.S: I am writing this mile high and the lady beside me has her gaze fixated in the sky. I don't get people's obsession with window seats or the clouds. It's very interesting to me. Anyway, she's otherwise been a good passenger so no biggie. 

Today's life lesson (this sounded so pretentious but humor me please) is that we mostly only need one. Yes, one admission, one job acceptance, one spouse (except you are an ojukokoro), one car... of course, there are things in life that we require more than one for. But usually, one is enough. I say this because many times we apply for something and get many NOs or everyone but you is getting married, it is very easy to be discouraged or heartbroken about very many rejections. But before you give up hope, remember that eventually you can only attend a school at a time/marry one person at a time/insert whatever else here; your yes will come. Sometimes, it won't (you know, I'm always pragmatic). And it will be hard at first and you might never find out why you didn't get it, but you will be okay. 

The life I'm living now, there was a time I dreamed of if. And gosh it's so easy to forget that we have some of the things we wanted desperately. I know it is irritating to read someone else recount their blessings sometimes, (side eye at hashtag blessed folks) because I know life can be hard but if you think deeply, you would agree that God answers prayers. 

Anyway, this was supposed to be just a little encouragement for anyone reading to hang in there. Recently, medical doctors on Instagram did a "behind the square" challenge, during which many of them posted their real life struggles that might have otherwise not been obvious because we put out best selves out there and Instagram is the mother devil. So most people talked about how they were rejected from their dream schools/residency programs (whew I can write books on rejection) and other cool stuff like that. But one of my favorites, Lauren said,  look this life she has as a Harvard trained dermatologist, married to another Harvard trained doctor with 3 of the cutest kids on Instagram is her wildest dreams come true. And that while others' problems were being rejected from schools, hers was survival. Coming from the background she did (siblings in jail, uncles being gunned down), she never even thought she would make it out alive, much less get into Harvard medical school. So everything else, every new day she gets with her babies is a bonus.


I hate to trivialize anyone's problems but damn if that doesn't get you thinking; about the hundreds of people definitely better than you but who never made it. I started to think, I know I'm not the best. Chiillllle, I'm GOOD but I'm not here because I'm the best. I'm here because grace found me. Somehow, I was lucky to be born into the family I have. You know, merely lucky and blessed to have parents who cared enough to invest in me; lucky enough to attend the schools I did; lucky enough to live in a free (albeit somewhat problematic) country with tremendous opportunities; lucky enough to have a tribe of great people supporting me and rejoicing when I win and encouraging me when I lose; lucky enough to have found God. 

So if I have God and I have them and I have good health, everything will be fine. I know, I know: what if you don't have good enough parents or tribe? Find them. It doesn't have to be blood relatives. Be that person for others and then before you know it you already have your own tribe. Whatever you do, relax. It will be okay. Remember to keep doing and moving; even when you get rejected, in the end, you will probably get one. And don't we mostly just need one? Trust God. Laugh. And be happy. After all, you are alive.