For a very LONG—lots of emphasis on the long—time, I was natural. That meant that there were no chemicals or relaxers in my hair. Hello Mummy. She made sure that none of her daughters got a perm as long as we were still in secondary school. So, even though we held on to pillows with our teeth or sometimes shed some tears at the hairdresser's, she didn't budge. It was either that or a low cut. Of course, we chose the former. Bless her though. Now, I have a head filled with thick, long and beautiful hair. I have since relaxed my hair though. Actually, because I was in boarding school and frankly, even up till recently, I wasn't one to pay attention to my hair, it was a good decision after all; not having relaxers as a child.
After a certain hairdresser recently cut off a big chunk of my hair while claiming to be 'trimming' it and even had the audacity to say I was rude to her (story for another day), I realized how much potential my hair had if I cared for it. Not to brag to you guys—I am totally bragging hahaha—but I come from a long line of great hair. Ha, you would think Rapunzel was my mother's mother. LOL. Truthfully though, I knew my hair had enough potential to be great. So, came the dilemma. Do I transition to natural hair and then later chop off the relaxed ends? Or Do I relax it consistently every six to eight weeks? Or Do I continue with what I already do, relax it just twice or thrice a year? Or Do I just chop it all off and start over? To be totally honest, that last part wasn't an option. I am NOT cutting my hair. No way. So, I started my research. From blog to blog to blog. From a YouTube video to another and onto another. The information/resources were endless and I ended up being more confused than I initially was.
On one of the blogs I visited, while talking about the big chop, the blogger made a statement that first made me laugh and then irritated me. She said:
"Getting a big chop and deciding to go natural is one of the BEST decisions you'll ever make."
PAUSE. HOLD ON. Best gini?* Deciding to make God the center of you life and walk in his path. Deciding to pick up a career you think is great. Deciding to CURE CANCER. Deciding to write that book or start that project that gets you your Nobel prize. Deciding to spend the rest of your life with someone. Deciding to run for President or Governor or even your school's Student Union leader. Deciding to bring forth children. Those are all EXCEEDINGLY GREAT decisions and some, the best you will ever make. But deciding to stop putting chemicals in your hair is NOT, will NEVER be the best decision made. What???? It is JUST hair.
Typical African Natural Hair. Mixture of both? Permed Hair
Let's all take a deep breath. Shall we? Good. Natural hair consumes time and can be the most frustrating thing ever. Just ask me. I think I may have hated my natural hair at some point, for lack of any other word. Not because I wasn't proud of it or it wasn't fine. In fact, my hair was every girl's dream. Except, it gave me nightmares. It's extremely worrisome how angry my natural sisters get when someone who was natural decides to get a perm. A natural Vlogger actually posted a video of the process of getting a perm on her natural hair. The comment section was like a war-zone with different people firing all kinds of insults, accusing her of bringing shame to the natural community. Uh-oh. Chimamnda Adichie once implied that girls with perm are trying too hard to be like white girls. Sigh.
Natural hair is beautiful. Those cute teeny weeny Afros and even the full ones give me life. But, to each, his own. Or rather, her own. If you want to be natural, good. If you want a perm, also good. If you want to go bald, be my guest. As long as it is what you're comfortable with. Girls, there is too much war in this world. There's no need to start another one because of hair. What matters is caring for your mane and making sure it is healthy. Scratch that, you don't have to take care of it. Perhaps, you'd rather wear extensions and braids. Go for it girl. Most importantly, let's remember that after all is said and done, it really is just hair.
P.S; I still haven't decided on what I want for my own mane.
Love,
I
*gini?-what?
ALL PICTURES WERE GOT FROM RANDOM GOOGLE SEARCHES. I TAKE NO CREDIT FOR THEM.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Much ado about hair o my dear. We put ourselves under unnecessary pressure all because we want to follow trend. I'm an advocate of healthy hair but we should take care of every part of our body generally. I'm natural now but I'm not sure i'll be natural forever, I'm comfortable with it now, doesn't mean I will be comfortable with it forever. Not even in Nigeria here that hair products are expensive. Aristotle once said 'man know thyself'. So I say to you 'woman know thyself and what thy can live it'. I once heard a story about a woman whose potential husband left her cuz she refused to relax her hair. I mean that's just ridiculous, hair over husband?!! Lol. PS-sorry for the long comment.
ReplyDeleteSame thing I tell myself; even if I go natural, I'm quite sure it won't be forever. I just feel naturalistas are 'bullying' people into becoming natural. Lol. I mean yeah, we should embrace our natural hair and all but at the end of it all, to each, her own right? The woman who didn't relax her hair because of a potential husband; hmmn. That's kinda dicey. In that, it really may not be about the hair as much as it is about her wanting to make her own decision. That is, to be free to make whatever choice she deems fit. I strongly believe it is not just superficial that the guy dumped her for her hair but it also means he's loving her based on some conditions which is a no no for me. You know what I mean? I mean it's just hair after all like we said. Anyway, I better not start another post here, lol. Thank you for stopping by! :-) And no, no comment is ever too long :-D
DeleteSeriously, it is a general syndrome in we girls, always confused about everything even as they get that in which they initially thought was what they wanted, on seeing another, they begin to have doubt about the initial thought, I, inclusive (shines teeth) but with all these said, what is really important is taking care of the hair, either perm, relaxed, extensions, or bald. Taking good care of the hair is what matters most. Like you said, 'it's just hair'. C'mon
ReplyDeleteLol, I know right. I'm equally a very indecisive person. Who knows, tomorrow I may be a huge fan of Natural hair—I kinda am already hehe. I am sure though, that I won't ever criticize people based on what they choose to do to their hair. True, taking care of your hair is what matters. Thanks for stopping by :-)
DeleteWhile it seems nice to have long, natural hair, it really shouldn’t be the end goal of people. As long as you keep it healthy and comfortable, nothing could go wrong. Some people might judge you for getting a perm, but it wouldn’t have an effect on you as long as you’re doing well for yourself. Anyway, thanks for sharing your thoughts with us. All the best!
ReplyDeleteVictor Peterson