Fake it Till You Become It

I have been feeling completely exhausted in recent times. Not necessarily physically; more like burnt out; overwhelmed; just tired. But the one thing I have refused to do is give up. I don't even complain (that much) about it. Once in a while, I chip it in conversations with my siblings and friends about how tired I am, but I have refused to stop or give up. I just keep doing.  I have a restless mind, so I tend to dream a lot. Sometimes the dreams feel so real that I'd have to wake up. In between one of such dreams, I woke up last night and then it occurred to me; how can I be tired when the bible says those that hope/wait upon the Lord renew their strength? Eureka.

 "But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."- Isaiah 40:31

So although I run or work walk as much as I need to, I will never be weary or tired or burnt out. Instead my strength will be renewed. Look, I understand how devil would want to keep people from reading the word. There are too many truths there for children of God. It's like a treasury, but if you never open it, you'd never find it. I went back to sleep, but woke up earlier than normal, feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. I don't want to be histrionic and say I had a vision, haha, but I know I feel like I am just getting started.

Now sometimes we have all the strength in the world, but still feel like we are not good enough. I know. I have been there. Particularly less confident people or quiet people (I am still editing & refining my post on introverts) in this loud world; you would often feel less smart than your loud and talkative counterparts. You would feel like you don't have much to offer. As a matter of fact, you do. Keep telling yourself you can, and one day you'll believe it. I did not always think I was beautiful. In secondary school (high school), I used to see the more endowed girls and think, I'd never be that pretty. I was (still am) skinny, I had thick natural hair (that my mama just wouldn't let me perm) and I was flat as hell (front and back) lmao. But for some reason, my Dad started to call me his "beautiful daughter"; in emails, in text messages, phone calls, even on Facebook. I don't know how or when, but I started to believe him. I KNOW as a matter of fact that I am beautiful. I don't care what anyone else thinks. My heavenly father and earthly parents think I am to die for and that's what matters. Guess who chopped off her relaxed hair for natural hair? Me. Guess who is comfortable in her own skin? ME. I would leave home without make up or accessories and not give a hoot. Same thing goes for smartness. My Mom used to always say, "It's you Ifeoluwa; I know you're capable" Whenever I did less than she expected, she used to complain not because it wasn't good enough, but because it was not good enough FOR ME.  I started to believe her. Now I don't go around thinking I'm Einstein. But I am somewhat confident about my intellectual prowess. Ok truth be told, that still needs lots of work Lol. I was (am) lucky, I have great cheerleaders and people who fiercely believe in me enough to encourage me. You might not have such people around, so be that person for yourself.

Bottom line, convince yourself you are great. Remind yourself everyday of how great you are. Pretend to be great. Fake being great till you actually become it. You still don't believe me? Watch Princeton trained social psychologist, Amy Cuddy tell you then.

Go on and conquer.

Love,
I