Friday Reflections

 1.) Does Shonda Rhimes know the lines to her most famous TV shows and movies.

2.) Mariska Hargitay on being TV's ICON and helping survivors of sexual violence.

3.) How this couple is managing the wife's HIV diagnosis. Medical Science is pretty amazing. The advancements in medical science are taken for granted because to think just mere decades ago HIV was a death sentence and now it can basically be cured (because it can be undetectable) is actually miraculous to me. Thank God for the gift of science.

On Finding Happiness: Worry, Mindset, and Stuff

There is a verse in the Bible—and I know I’ve lost you from that but walk with me, okay?—that implores us to consider the lilies and how they grow. They don’t labor or spin. They just are. And then in an interesting metaphor, that passage goes on to say even Solomon in all his splendor—and boy did that dude have a LOT of splendor—was not nearly as splendor-filled as lilies. 

You can see where I’m going, right?

Ha.

There is a lot of pain in this world. There is a LOT of it. You know it, I know it. You have it, I have it. Part of what makes us alive, part of what makes us living, breathing things is that we inevitably have some pain. That we have some challenges. What sets us apart from each other—well, apart from generational wealth, participants in varying systems of just and unjust governments, and luck—is the mindset with which we approach these problems. If this is getting to the part where it sounds like a cliché, just walk with me, please. I once heard the famous therapist, Lori Gottlieb, say something so profound. And then when I read her book, Maybe You Should Talk to Someone—and everyone should read this PHENOMENAL BOOK—I read the expanded version. In essence, the point her therapist through her made was everyone is going to have to feel pain. Life happens. You lose your job. You get a divorce. You hate your job. You hate your spouse. You can’t have kids. You can’t find a spouse. You run out of money. And these are the ones that are technically fixable, never mind the life-shattering, life-altering pains. There are then little pains on top of the main, heavy pains. So that will happen. But you actually don’t have to suffer. While you cannot really choose the pain, you can most definitely choose the suffering. 

Some Books I've Been Reading

I did tell you we’ll make up for the lack of a Book of the Month last month, didn’t I? I’m here to fulfill that not a promise. 

Here are some books that I’ve read this year that are noteworthy for different reasons; maybe they’ll motivate you to read or reread anything from this list

Why We Must Get Involved in Local Elections

All politics is local. You’ve probably heard that so much that it’s lost its meaning. And in today’s world, with all the insanity that exists within our politics, it almost tempting to think that no longer applies. It’s almost tempting to block it all out. But it’s never been more important to understand how the national frenzies making headlines can have implications for state and local governments. It’s never been more important to hold space for the politics happening around us as much as those making national headlines. How do local policy decisions affect citizens? Although the obsession and overwhelming consumption the soap opera-like nature of our presidential elections obscures and consumes everything else, much of the decisions about our health, schools, neighborhoods are determined by local elections.

Book of the Month: Maame by Jessica George

I read the most delightful book. It’s called Maame. Now that I think of it, perhaps “delightful” is not the ideal descriptive? 

Welcome to the Book of the Month! We missed last month and I’m not sure why, but we’ll make it up.

The Book of this month is called Maame by Jessica George. Maame is a novel about Maddie—when we meet her, her life is a boring chaos. Her mother is never around; her father suffers from advanced-stage Parkinson’s and Maddie is his caretaker; her brother is the type of irritating hustler you don’t want around you; and at work, her boss is a nightmare and the work itself strips Maddie of reasons to live. Things aren’t looking good, to say the least. Then her mom returns from her latest trip and Maddie can finally move out. The book shows us how the self-acknowledged “late bloomer” attempts to find her footing, the numerous mistakes she makes during this attempt, and how she survives the impossible. Maame is a nickname given to Maddie by her mother. It is a name she has come to hate because of the burden in places on her and how it saddles her with responsibility that shouldn’t even be hers in the first place. It’s also this name—this forced-on identity—that jolts Maame to the life she deserves.

The "Difficult" Black Woman: Understanding The Hostility Towards Amanda Seales

Hollywood is a weird place. Some might even call it evil. It makes sense then to consider it a waste of time writing or, frankly, commenting about their every whim and caprice. And yet, such is the case that almost everything finds its way back to that awful ecosystem. So, you kind of find yourself talking about them no matter how much you deliberately avoid them.

Today, let’s talk about Amanda Seales.

Now, if you think this will be the typical rant against her and how awful you think she is, you will be wrong. I am neither here nor there about Amanda Seales. I agree with her on some of her stances. Others, I find a bit too reductive. You know, same way I would view someone who I don’t know personally. So, there is that.

But Lord, this woman gets all the hate. She is awful. She is mean. She is this. She is that. Oh, her voice is screeching. She is difficult to work with. It must be exhausting being her. Now, you know the first sign that she’s not quite all of these things being described? She actually cares. She is one of the few celebrities or public figures to admit that she finds it puzzling why she is hated so much. She doesn’t chalk it up to obtuse things like “oh it’s haters” or “while you’re hating me, I’m over here, making money” No. She actively asks why people hate her. She actively expresses her disappointment at how Black Hollywood has treated her and exiled her into isolation in a business that thrives on connections and community. 

Black media.

Friday Reflections

 1.) I've missed this so much. It's been so long I did it that I don't even know if I know how to do it anymore. 

2.) Regina King talks about the grief of losing her only child. I feel like I should say something profound here but I can't. There is nothing that can be said except I pray God himself comforts her.

3) Yes, after making a hoopla, I came back, rather unceremoniously too.