Joe Biden Exited the Presidential Race: So What? Now What?

Ah Jeez. I wrote this elaborate post the other day about the two candidates before you. 

Y'all.

Here we are. The last 48 hours. Here we are. 

Sunday (the day before yesterday) afternoon feels like one of those days where you will always remember where you were when you heard the "news". 

And so it happened that Joe Biden dropped out of the presidential race. There is a LOT to unpack about everything that's happened. I know that no one needs my analysis. I have nothing new to say apart from what everyone and their mamas already said. Yet, I feel a gnawing to just say something here; perhaps because I made this whole case for Joe Biden just two posts ago. I think the main reason why it always feels so odd to be quiet in monumental times like this is akin to what Toni Morrison once said:

This is precisely the time when artists go to work

There is no time for despair

No place for self-pity

No need for silence

No room for fear

We speak

We write

We do language

This is how civilizations heal

How To Spend Three Days in London AKA A Three Days (72 Hours) in London Itinerary

There was a time bloggers just posted about trips and vacations. I tried that a couple of times and it was almost physically painful. That said, I want to try that for this vacation I'm currently on (Current me popping in parenthesis through this. Note to say this was THREE whole months ago haha but I'll leave the tenses as they are, as usual, for better flow. Something else you should know about this trip is that it's three countries/cities but London is the first stop. The others to come). So I'm writing in real time. If I get bored of having to transcribe the events of the day every evening, then that's where this stops. There also won't be that many pictures. Sorry. (That sounded curt but I really do mean the apology; sorry for not adding as many photos. Getting the pictures from that long ago is a lot of work).  I still feel a type of way about my photos just being out there in the ether. Plus, organizing pictures is a whole other chaos.

Anyway, we arrived in London from America at about 10AM local time. The six hours and change flight was pretty uneventful. Praise God. From the airport, we headed down to our hotel—about an hour's drive. Our hotel was smack dab in Trafalgar Square. I was particularly exhausted (from literally working till the very minute we left) so I just jumped into bed and slept. I woke up, took a shower, and we headed to our hotel's rooftop for complimentary drinks. Yay, for a nice view of London.

There Are Two Candidates Before You

It feels really weird to be quiet about an election with so much stakes for our lives and for our country. There is a cloud of noise out there so I'm going to put this as simply as possible. So here goes. There are two candidates — whatever hangups you have about there being only two choices, you have to get over. Sorry. So, yes, there are two candidates. 

Friday Reflections

 1.) Does Shonda Rhimes know the lines to her most famous TV shows and movies.

2.) Mariska Hargitay on being TV's ICON and helping survivors of sexual violence.

3.) How this couple is managing the wife's HIV diagnosis. Medical Science is pretty amazing. The advancements in medical science are taken for granted because to think just mere decades ago HIV was a death sentence and now it can basically be cured (because it can be undetectable) is actually miraculous to me. Thank God for the gift of science.

On Finding Happiness: Worry, Mindset, and Stuff

There is a verse in the Bible—and I know I’ve lost you from that but walk with me, okay?—that implores us to consider the lilies and how they grow. They don’t labor or spin. They just are. And then in an interesting metaphor, that passage goes on to say even Solomon in all his splendor—and boy did that dude have a LOT of splendor—was not nearly as splendor-filled as lilies. 

You can see where I’m going, right?

Ha.

There is a lot of pain in this world. There is a LOT of it. You know it, I know it. You have it, I have it. Part of what makes us alive, part of what makes us living, breathing things is that we inevitably have some pain. That we have some challenges. What sets us apart from each other—well, apart from generational wealth, participants in varying systems of just and unjust governments, and luck—is the mindset with which we approach these problems. If this is getting to the part where it sounds like a cliché, just walk with me, please. I once heard the famous therapist, Lori Gottlieb, say something so profound. And then when I read her book, Maybe You Should Talk to Someone—and everyone should read this PHENOMENAL BOOK—I read the expanded version. In essence, the point her therapist through her made was everyone is going to have to feel pain. Life happens. You lose your job. You get a divorce. You hate your job. You hate your spouse. You can’t have kids. You can’t find a spouse. You run out of money. And these are the ones that are technically fixable, never mind the life-shattering, life-altering pains. There are then little pains on top of the main, heavy pains. So that will happen. But you actually don’t have to suffer. While you cannot really choose the pain, you can most definitely choose the suffering. 

Some Books I've Been Reading

I did tell you we’ll make up for the lack of a Book of the Month last month, didn’t I? I’m here to fulfill that not a promise. 

Here are some books that I’ve read this year that are noteworthy for different reasons; maybe they’ll motivate you to read or reread anything from this list

Why We Must Get Involved in Local Elections

All politics is local. You’ve probably heard that so much that it’s lost its meaning. And in today’s world, with all the insanity that exists within our politics, it almost tempting to think that no longer applies. It’s almost tempting to block it all out. But it’s never been more important to understand how the national frenzies making headlines can have implications for state and local governments. It’s never been more important to hold space for the politics happening around us as much as those making national headlines. How do local policy decisions affect citizens? Although the obsession and overwhelming consumption the soap opera-like nature of our presidential elections obscures and consumes everything else, much of the decisions about our health, schools, neighborhoods are determined by local elections.

Book of the Month: Maame by Jessica George

I read the most delightful book. It’s called Maame. Now that I think of it, perhaps “delightful” is not the ideal descriptive? 

Welcome to the Book of the Month! We missed last month and I’m not sure why, but we’ll make it up.

The Book of this month is called Maame by Jessica George. Maame is a novel about Maddie—when we meet her, her life is a boring chaos. Her mother is never around; her father suffers from advanced-stage Parkinson’s and Maddie is his caretaker; her brother is the type of irritating hustler you don’t want around you; and at work, her boss is a nightmare and the work itself strips Maddie of reasons to live. Things aren’t looking good, to say the least. Then her mom returns from her latest trip and Maddie can finally move out. The book shows us how the self-acknowledged “late bloomer” attempts to find her footing, the numerous mistakes she makes during this attempt, and how she survives the impossible. Maame is a nickname given to Maddie by her mother. It is a name she has come to hate because of the burden in places on her and how it saddles her with responsibility that shouldn’t even be hers in the first place. It’s also this name—this forced-on identity—that jolts Maame to the life she deserves.

The "Difficult" Black Woman: Understanding The Hostility Towards Amanda Seales

Hollywood is a weird place. Some might even call it evil. It makes sense then to consider it a waste of time writing or, frankly, commenting about their every whim and caprice. And yet, such is the case that almost everything finds its way back to that awful ecosystem. So, you kind of find yourself talking about them no matter how much you deliberately avoid them.

Today, let’s talk about Amanda Seales.

Now, if you think this will be the typical rant against her and how awful you think she is, you will be wrong. I am neither here nor there about Amanda Seales. I agree with her on some of her stances. Others, I find a bit too reductive. You know, same way I would view someone who I don’t know personally. So, there is that.

But Lord, this woman gets all the hate. She is awful. She is mean. She is this. She is that. Oh, her voice is screeching. She is difficult to work with. It must be exhausting being her. Now, you know the first sign that she’s not quite all of these things being described? She actually cares. She is one of the few celebrities or public figures to admit that she finds it puzzling why she is hated so much. She doesn’t chalk it up to obtuse things like “oh it’s haters” or “while you’re hating me, I’m over here, making money” No. She actively asks why people hate her. She actively expresses her disappointment at how Black Hollywood has treated her and exiled her into isolation in a business that thrives on connections and community. 

Black media.

Friday Reflections

 1.) I've missed this so much. It's been so long I did it that I don't even know if I know how to do it anymore. 

2.) Regina King talks about the grief of losing her only child. I feel like I should say something profound here but I can't. There is nothing that can be said except I pray God himself comforts her.

3) Yes, after making a hoopla, I came back, rather unceremoniously too. 

Book of the Month: My Last Innocent Year By Daisy Alpert Florin

Another Book of the Month! Welcome. The book of this month is My last Innocent Year by Doris Alpert Florin.

I'm going to start out by saying, I first heard about this book on TwoNightStands. It was one of their best books of 2023. And it did not disappoint.

To My Sister -- Our Wildest Dream

There is a dream. There are even multiple dreams. And then reality comes and blows the dream so out of water, so out of bounds.

It started with a whisper after dinner, once, when she was like 11 (12? 10?)—basically that age when everyone wants to be a doctor. But then hers grew into a dogged but steady pursuit; gently going through every single obstacle. Ha.

I always say there are two kinds of people—those who come out of the womb knowing exactly what they want to do and the rest of us who spend all our lives figuring it out. Even though my sister is the former, it was HARD. Nevertheless, she persisted.

International Women's Day 2024

Call it being weary. Call it laziness. Call it being pedantic. But this year on International Women's Day (IWD) 2024, I decided there wasn't any point to writing anything original. As you know I've always posted on International Women's Day on this blog. This year is no different. Except for all the ways in which it is different. I'm pulling words from over the years that I have written on IWD. I don't know how many times you have to say something for it to stick. Here is what I know: I won't and can't tire of reiterating the need for equality in our world; the need for women to have it better; the need for women to be heard and seen. The goal is to wake up one day and realize there is so much fairness, enlightenment, and equity/equality that we no longer need IWD. Ah a dream. 

Let's count down, shall we? My words over the years. Here ya go.

It's The Usual Things

It’s the usual things. One of my fave YouTubers said she recently rushed to the ER thinking she was having a heart attack. It was a panic attack. If you’re a millennial who hasn’t had the heart attack scare, only to be told it’s panic/anxiety, you’re one of the luckiest ones of our generation. It’s the usual things. Health challenges. It’s the usual things. Career lows. It’s the usual things. Rejection. It’s the usual things. Relational issues. It’s the usual things. Fear. It’s the usual things. Depression.

Fools Are Multiplying Too Rapidly; We Can't Stay Quiet

I recently saw an extremely bizarre thing. It was a  short clip of a podcast (we have to abolish these things once and for all. Podcasts are killing us, folks) where a man, let's call him Man A, asks another man, let's call him Man B, to say which animal he is least afraid of. Man B says fish. Man A attempts to correct him by saying "fish is not an animal". The rest of the almost two minute clip, is Man B being absolutely gobsmacked while Man A continues to scream that fish is NOT an ANIMAL, but a SEA CREATURE. They launched into a screaming match arguing the most basic fact. My God.

How long do you think humanity is going to last before we destroy ourselves?

Book of the Month: Nightcrawling

Welcome to The Book of the Month! Y'all... no need to explain the long absence from here. See previous post for an explanation. Alright, let's dive in. The book of this month  is Nightcrawling by Leila Mottley. 

I am going to give extraordinary grace to this book because I honestly believe it suffered from the curse of being read after two Chimamanda Adichie novels—I recently reread Americanah and Purple Hibiscus.  Listen, once you’ve experienced the ease and delicious smoothness of Chimamanda's work, everybody else just seems like they are trying too hard. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

In sum, the book is about Kiara, steeped in abject poverty and neglect, who has to scrap by on the streets of Oakland, and who, one night, mistakenly stumbles into the failure of America's justice system. For a longer version of the preceding sentence: Kiara and her brother, Marcus, live in a rundown apartment in Oakland called Regal-Hi. Both had to drop out of high school and their family has been fractured by death and prison. Meanwhile, rather than find a way to care for his sister, Marcus is too consumed by his dream of rap stardom; leaving Kiara to hunt for work to pay their rent and take care of them. At the same time, she has to keep the nine-year old boy next door (whose mother has abandoned) fed. In any case, as a minor and high school dropout, her options for work are limited and thanks to a misunderstanding on a drunken night, she turns to a job she never wanted but definitely needs.